09 January 2011


it's weird when you are finally a doctor, but haven't work yet.
it's like you are between your home and your favourite restaurant, and although u almost reach there, you are still not there yet.
it's weird when you used to look at doctors and you said i want to be him/ her, and then when you are finally one, you feel awkward. 
it's weird when your mum used to tell you, 'look, she's a doctor', and now it is YOU dat people look at and tell their kids 'look, she's a  doctor. you want to become a doctor too, right?'
seriously, everything feels weird.
maybe i am not used of this 'not a student' status anymore.
but i refuse to be called a DOCTOR. i haven't start working yet, and hell i'm scared of what might happen in the future.
my uncle (he's a doctor) is already offering me to work at his clinic.
my dad gave me forms and list of my future salary.
seriously, everything freaks me out.
i'm scared.
i've been trying to find articles about HO, and most of them makes me more scared than ever!
but perhaps it is better to expect the worst.

p.s. in this kind of time, i always sing to myself 
'que sera2, whatever will be, will be' 
(while imagining the cute Luna Lovegood in Harry Potter)

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